The Party

Choosing the members of your wedding party is a task that should not be taken lightly. These people play an important role in your wedding day and in supporting the bride all through the preparation process. A bride needs to know that her maid of honor will be her right, and sometimes her left, hand. She needs to know that her ushers won't be MIA when Aunt Nellie shows up and needs assistance using her walker to get to her seat. With so many things that need to be orchestrated, you need to know that your party members are reliable and able to take on the tasks that they are assigned.

The Dynamic:
Group dynamics are really important. A bride needs to know she isn't putting together a group of people that will end up bickering and battling through the entire wedding process, because that ends up being additional stress on the bride that she really doesn't need. The bigger the party, the bigger the chances are for chaos.
One approach that seems popular is to keep the bridal party down to a small, intimate bunch. I've even seen no bridal party at all, or maybe just one maid of honor and one best man and that's it. This isn't a bad idea. The truth of the matter is...you really don't need an army of people in order to pull off a wedding. So keeping things to a minimum can actually be less stress than having ten girls with ten different tastes ready to help you out.

The Mission:
When selecting your party, it's important that you select people, be it two or twenty, that know what the mission is, and that is supporting the bride and groom in whatever way they need up to and on the wedding day. Not to diminish anyone, but the wedding just isn't about the bridal party. And everybody needs to be on board with that concept.

The Commitment:
Everybody has a life. You must keep that in mind when selecting your bridal party. A bride wants the members to feel as honored to be in the wedding party as she is to have them in the wedding party. With people having busy schedules and children and careers and lives, your wedding will probably not be the very top priority on anybody else's list except yours. But the last thing you want to think is that your wedding is a huge inconvenience for somebody in your wedding party. Organizing dress fittings and bridal showers then feels like an imposition instead of something that somebody eagerly wants to do. If you are the kind of bride to be tuned into feelings, that may make you feel bad. Then you are tip toeing around bridesmaids instead of them tip toeing around you.

The Council:
I am the type of bride that feels like it's a lot easier to toss ideas around a small council of people, make a decision myself, and then bring it to the masses for execution. When there are too many people stirring the pot, I get stressed out. I don't want to not have input, but as I've noticed when I see a menu with tons of options, the greater the selection, the longer it takes to make a decision. Sometimes too much input can be a bad thing, so for me, I found that I have a small bridal committee that helps me make decisions and do research, and a larger group that will take on the different assignments.

The Talent:
Everybody has something to bring to the table. Some may come boasting their skillset, others may not realize that they have much to contribute. It's important to know what each person in the bridal party is good at. Some people are better at making calls, some may be better at making playlists, and others may be good at making crafts. Tap into what people are good at and figure out how to positively use that in your wedding.

The bottom line is the wedding is about the bride...and the groom. Having the best support system during this fun, yet stressful time is key. Even if your support system is just your sister or your bff, the party should consist of whoever it takes to get things done and keep the bride sane.